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Compliments.

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14 years 5 months ago #22480 by Envy
Compliments. was created by Envy
When I was in Camden, I really wanted to compliment lots of people on their look etc., but a large part of me just 'didn't dare'. I was in formalwear as well, so I felt very out of place anyway.

I think I fear compliments being interpreted as a 'move'. I saw a few Chinese people with all-blue hair and one with even all pure white hair! I really wanted to know how the guy did it without all of his hair falling out, as I was thinking of similar things for myself (as I mentioned on the 'Hair' thread).

So.. What do you think about compliments? Do you actively give them out? Have your compliments ever been mis-interpreted?

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14 years 5 months ago #22485 by Kuroboshi
Replied by Kuroboshi on topic Re: Compliments.
Only ever seen 1 person I'd want to compliment because of what he was wearing.

However, it seemed pretty weird for me to just go up to someone I don't know and say something. No-one around here has ever really stood out enough in what they are wearing for me to actually care.

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14 years 5 months ago #22486 by Polaristhe2
Replied by Polaristhe2 on topic Re: Compliments.
Sure, I give compliments all the time to that cute guy who lives behind that big glass in my bathroom. :)

But no, if someone smirks at compliments I usually apologize and say that I was wrong and that I have nothing at all to compliment. That usually stirs up some bad blood. Get what you give I say.

Choices we make and the choices that are, when Hell is so close and Heaven so far.

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14 years 5 months ago #22498 by StephenG
Replied by StephenG on topic Re:Compliments.
I give compliments.
sometimes ,i admit, they are less than genuine especially if i've been sent to do damage control.
My best ones are obviously genuine one
...when they come from a real place, you'd be amazed where they can lead...

And I'm just a human;so yeah, a compliment always makes me feel good
(sometimes, i am suspicious of the validity, )
but compliments are always a boost...even more so when they come from a stranger

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14 years 5 months ago #22514 by black_magnolia
Replied by black_magnolia on topic Re:Compliments.
I give out compliments when I feel like it. I don't think about them much in advance, but when I see something/someone worth complimenting - I do it.
It may be easier to give compliments to someone you know then to a stranger, but everyone likes to hear them.
Envy, I think nobody will think you are hitting on them if you just stop them, say you like their hair, ask how they achieved that colour, thank them and go your way. Maybe they will find it a bit strange, but if you were polite, then they will be polite and probably won't think about it any more after you leave. Probably it's not a good idea to stop a person when you see they are in a hurry or otherwise preocuppied, but otherwise I don't see a problem.
I think complimenting someone should be as easy as stopping someone to ask about directions or what's the time, but sadly people seem to have problems saying something nice just for the sake of it.
Also, not all cultures are the same. My friend is often in Paris and she tells me how constantly people come up to her to compliment her, be it an old granny to some handsome guy. A guy even bought her a coffee just because he liked how cute she looked and left her alone - just like that; he didn't try any moves, bought her that coffee and left the café. I was very astonished to hear that, but it's a misery that such random acts of kindness are looked upon as not quite normal, while hooligans trashing their heads at soccer games is \"normal\" and people expect such behaviour... sorry for the little ramble... I just finished the topics about socialization and delinquency so I'm full of ideas... :silly:

To see a world in a Grain of Sand,
And a Heaven in a Wild Flower,
Hold Infinity in the palm of your hand,
And eternity in an hour.

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14 years 5 months ago #22516 by Envy
Replied by Envy on topic Re:Compliments.
Very interesting statements. I'm not sure what the culture here is on compliments..But I think many British people feel weird about compliments (we live up to our 'stuck up' stereotype when it comes to that). It's just a bit abnormal to interact with strangers so randomly, so I feel awkward. :S

I recall an experiment done where a young girl of about 3-4 years was left in the middle of a shopping centre and told to cry (as if lost) whilst hidden cameras watched her. Many times, it took hours for one person to ask her if she was lost and help her. I think in Britain we just fear the response to actions, i.e. in the case of that little girl, everyone fears being called a paedophile or something for trying to help.

If the same people are running the stalls in Camden when I'm next down, I'll see if I can get some hair tips then.

Oh..But then I would worry that they wouldn't hear my compliment and then I'd be ignored and very embarassed for trying..I tend not to get heard when I speak, generally.

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