White Lies

Yes, it is an Iron Maiden song... did we discuss little white lies?
I can't remember and couldn't find a similar topic.
Here's the deal: I hate lies. I hate being insincere. It makes me sick to my stomach if I have to tell a little white lie not tohurt anyone. What can I do? I've been put many times in this situation, of having to tell lies to my parents so not to hurt them. It is said that the truth, however painful is better than a lie. yet not to everyone, I see.
What would you choose: hurting a loved one by uttering the truth or telling them a little or big lie to make them feel ok?
Here's one of my many examples: my mom hates when I go with my boyfriend on a bike. She dreads the fact that we could go too fast and get involved in an accident. So, last year when we decided to go on a trip to the mountains by bike (mwhahahaaa) some 700 km I told her I was going some place else, and not on a bike. I did not feel good by doing this, but I felt I had to. This summer I confessd and told her that I did, but it was too late for her to worry.

Do you think I did a bad thing?

that's really up to you sweetie...if you feel guilty about it....I tell the truth..spare no feelings. Most people actually like that bout me, it's being blunt. Painfully truthful...I was raised with Thou shalt not lie...so I do my best. I think since I have been hurt twice, so bad, in my life that no knife or gun could make that kind of pain, that I tend no to care about anyones feelings. Even both sets of parents (adopted) to spare their worry. Parents worry regardless no matter what your age is...so really it would be easier for you to tell her the truth. That way if you are in an accident (spirits forbid!!) that she will not go on with the \"I told you so speech\" or want to kill you herself. Honestly when you reach a certain age you gotta tell your mom, \"look I know you don't like this but I am going to do it anyway so please let me call you when I get to where I am going and let you know I am okay\"....you kinda have to give up your pride a bit to concede to their worry. It's because she loves you....never forget that or take it for granted. I have many tims of my parents and feel guilty every time...

It's a tricky on isn't it. Yesterday my friend drove us to Thorpe Park and went like 40mph over the speed limit on the motorway... I'd told my mum we'd go steady so she wouldn't worry. And since I'm still safe I don't feel guilty since she's happy and I'm happy. But if ever anything happened I would feel absolutely awful.

I think it depends somewhat on how old you are. Once you're an adult, there are some things your parents just don't need to know about you.

I personally think little white lies are OK, in order to spare someone's feelings. For example, I recently told someone that the new paint job in their house was nice, when I really thought it was boring and bland. But she likes it and she's the one that has to live with it, not me.

I tell white lies all the time... I think everyone does. It saves hurting people's feelings. I think it should be classed as tact rather than lying though. And fair enough about the age comment. Since I'm now 18 (yay!) I don't feel guilty about not telling my parents stuff. Because it is my life now, I'm a grown-up... Wow that's frightening.

Congratulations! I know your 18th is \"the big one\" in the UK.

And you're right, it's more tact than lying. If everyone was brutally honest, all of the time, I don't think anyone would have any friends left.